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Monthly Humor Column by Kathy Carlton Willis—

Might As Well Go Outside and Eat Grass!

 

Do I need to go outside and eat grass?

Let me back up and explain. You have to see how my mind tracks.

Hubby came home for lunch and I told him I was under the weather. (Where did that idiom originate? I looked it up. Apparently it comes from when people on ships felt ill, either from adverse weather or from the rocking of the boat, who were told to go below deck, which was phrased, “under the weather.”)

Okay, so follow me. My mind jerks from wondering about the idiom back to preparing lunch for HubRuss.

Then Jazzy, the Boston Terrier fur-child went outdoors and seemed to stay out a long time. A little while after she came back in, she made these horrible retching sounds and before we knew it, there was a huge pile of puked-up grass on our rug.

Poor Jazzy! (Poor carpet!)

I cleaned it up while hubby watched. Then went to find the stain-out spray to take care of the rug.

When it was time for hubster to go back to work, his parting words were, “Feel better soon…”

I thought—oh, that’s nice. He’s wishing me well. Nope. He finished his sentence.

…Jazzy.”

What about the wife? No “feel better” for me?

It got me to thinking. The only reason Jazzy got sympathy was because she had proof of her illness. Anyone can puke up a pile if they go outside and eat grass!

Where’s the life lesson in my aha! moment?

We all feel under the weather from time to time. It might be a physical symptom, an emotional hurt, or just not quite clicking. Fuzzy, foggy, and frustrated. But then we have a choice. We can either faith it ‘till we make it, putting one foot in front of the other and focusing on simply doing the next thing. Or, we can go outside and eat grass, declare ourselves pitiful, and garner sympathy.

Which one is more productive? Pity is overrated. I’d rather gitter done. Our site is called “My Purpose Now.” I’m pretty certain my purpose right now isn’t to go outside and eat grass and be sick and pitiful. My purpose right now is to move forward even while feeling ick. We don’t have to run a marathon to fulfill our purpose. There are plenty of things we can focus on even when we’re under the weather. It’s our choice.

Will you go outside and eat grass, or do the next thing?

Grass? No thank you. I’m eating plenty of vegetables these days. I’ll select door number two!

 

 

 

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Kathy Carlton Willis: Kathy writes and speaks with a balance of funny and faith—whimsy and wisdom. Not many funny girls also have Bible degrees! As a pastor’s wife, she has plenty of material for her new Grin with Kathy column at MPN. She has four books coming out in the next couple of years: Speaker to SpeakerGrin with GraceGrin with Joy, and Grin with Peace. She’s affiliated with several Christian writer and speaker organizations and serves as a consultant for others in the publishing industry. Kathy anticipates great things for her 50s (despite the menopause monster), and is pursuing God’s goals with gusto as she dives in to this glorious decade. Kathy’s tagline captures her essence: Light & Lively: His Reflection/Her Laughter. Learn more about Kathy at: www.kathycarltonwillis.com/

13 Comments

  1. 2-2-2015

    Oh, Kathy! How I loved this. I’ve lived it, as well! It’s always a choice – show up and move ahead or puke it up and take a nap. Thanks for a great morning grin!

    • 2-2-2015

      Yeah, not the most “graceful” grin, but definitely truth. Here’s a prayer for us all to have a non-pity party non-puke pile day! 😉 My purpose now is to faith it ’til I make it!

  2. 2-2-2015

    Thanks Kathy…I’ve tried the grass thing…didn’t work.

    • 2-2-2015

      Sharon, it didn’t work for me, either! The first year of my disease (1992), I did the whole resting on the couch thing, watching the world go by. I decided I like being a participant much more than a spectator! And pitiful just isn’t very becoming on me!

  3. 2-2-2015

    As women of My Purpose Now we all seem to have more opportunity to feel those aches & pains of ongoing life. The grass may look inviting but like you reminded us the end result is even yuckier! Thanks and here’s to keeping on keeping on…

    • 2-2-2015

      Mona, that’s a great tie in…”the grass is always greener…” Yeah, until you puke up a pile of it! Keeping on is key! Thanks.

  4. 2-2-2015

    There’s a time to listen to our body’s request for rest and a time to get up and get going! Most of the time I’m so full of purpose that my body is trying to catch up, and that’s not good, either. Sigh. Still working on finding that balance!

    • 2-2-2015

      Ava, you are right about finding the balance. And I’ve had disability for almost 25 years, so rest is key to maintaining the best wellness possible. I think there is a mindset difference between being a spectator in life and a participant. Even those who need to rest don’t need to resign from being a part of God’s work. (And we can do some of our best work flat on our back, in prayer!) Praying for us all as we endeavor to seek that balance you speak of!

  5. 2-2-2015

    Love “faith it ’til I make it!” That’s one to remember, Kathy!

    • 2-2-2015

      Hally, I’ve said that phrase for years. Not sure where it originated, but it sure is the God-way to deal with challenges rather than the old “fake it ’til you make it” saying. Glad you liked it!

  6. 2-2-2015

    Kathy, you’ve created an image I won’t forget! Next time I feel sorry for myself, I’ll see Jazzy’s carpet deposit. : ) And I’ll choose instead to be on the gitter-done team with you.

    • 2-2-2015

      Kathleen, it’s not a pretty image, but it’s pretty realistic! Pity parties aren’t all they’re cracked up to be. I like gitter-done parties a lot better! Thanks for writing in!

  7. 2-4-2015

    Ha! Great article, Kathy. Isn’t that the way it goes? The dogger gets all the sympathy! But I love the way you handle your ick!

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